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I just returned from a business trip to the West Coast on an airline I won’t name. After being served my complimentary beverage, I happened to look down at the cocktail napkin and was puzzled to see the following words, “Welcome to the airline of Airline… we all have our baggage.” I turned to a colleague seated next to me, pointed to the napkin and said, “Huh?”

“Oh,” he replied with a cynic’s tone, “it’s a new reality show on cable.” Great, I thought, that’s just what we need – yet another program that attempts to make us believe it’s a depiction of life in real terms. Needless to say, reality television is yet one more example of something I’ve become cynical about lately. Sadly, I’m not alone.

Webster defines cynicism as, “An attitude of scornful or jaded negativity, especially a general distrust of the integrity or professed motives of others: the cynicism aroused by public scandals.” There is no question we are living in an age of cynicism. It seems more time and money is spent on perpetuating perceptions and stirring emotions rather than dealing with reality and solutions to critical issues.

I hate the expression, “Perception is Reality,” because it isn’t. Perception is what it is– an unsubstantiated view of reality. To perceive something is to understand it only as initially presented to the senses or the intellect. It is only after we have discerned the details that the reality becomes more apparent. We may perceive two persons in the distance but we are unable to discern whether they are men or women until they come closer to reveal additional details.

Great writers like Jonathan Swift, Voltaire and Mark Twain skillfully used the classic cynics’ tools – bitter irony, biting sarcasm and mirthful ridicule – to expose the follies of their times as well as the timeless foibles of humankind. Even though inspired by the realities of their world, their efforts were, nonetheless, works of fiction.

Each day we must discern between fiction and fact, perceptions and realities. We start the day around the water cooler discussing whatever the latest news may be, usually with the conversation turning cynical. The remainder of the day we work through the barrage of information that involves and affects our staff, our clients and our customers. We call our resident groups SOBs, a cynical industry-accepted acronym for the symphony, opera and ballet.

Fortunately, there are no similar descriptors for everyone else we deal with– our boards or committees, donors, sponsors, subscribers, single ticket buyers, volunteers, artists, their managers, unions, the arts council, code officials, contractors, law enforcement agencies, and, yes, politicians – among countless others. No wonder we easily fall into the trap of being cynical about what we must contend with. And it’s easy to see how our employees fall into this proverbial trap as well, especially with us leading them there.

What makes us so cynical about working with this multitude of varying attitudes, personalities and expectations? Could it be that our SOBs, for instance, have perceptions about us and our organizations that are far from the truth? Does their failure to communicate details about their events place unreasonable expectations on our staff at the last minute, and then do they balk at the reality of overtime to get the tasks accomplished in time?

Have we become so jaded by the unprofessional behaviors of the staff of the SOBs that we have lost interest in communicating because we are convinced it will do no good? Is there is a flattening of spirit amongst your employees where they have become less enthusiastic and mildly engaged in their responsibilities? Other than wanting to send them all off to some remote corner of Survivor’s Island, is there any end to this downward cycle?

A mentor once told me it’s not about what’s thrown at you, but rather how you deal with it that’s important. Cynics don’t attempt to manage the realities put before them. They only rationalize why things are the way they are and exhibit no faith or action to move forward regardless.

The manager’s only hope is to rise above the multitude of pessimism and hopelessness in an attempt to continue the quest for better solutions. It’s like taking back the streets of a neighborhood where the bad guys have been allowed to run rampant. It’s a belief that collaboration, in spite of the compromise of control, can be a better solution than fighting an uphill battle alone. It’s picturing all available resources in order to renew a sense of optimism, pride and a belief that the individual is at the helm of his or her destiny. Our outlook, our actions, and our decisions do matter to our employees and our families.

Singer/songwriter David Wilcox tells the story of when he was once working as a street musician. One day while waiting for the signal light to change on the same corner where David was performing, a man listened to David performing then said abruptly, “Why don’t you get a job?” As the man began to cross the street, David shouted, “Why don’t you sing?”

The man’s cynical remark assumed David was on his last luck–that the musician had given up on getting a “real” job only to go begging in the streets. David’s response, however, provided a dimension that man had never considered. It was also the musician’s attempt to underscore that he was not about to let a moment of cynicism drown out his song of living and endless possibilities.

Cynics are dream-killers and careerkillers. They are people who have– for whatever reason – decided to be negative and unhappy. They also like company, especially if we let them.

I am reminded of the quote by H. L. Mencken who said, “A cynic is a person who, when they smell flowers, looks around for a coffin.” Personally, I have no intention of looking for a coffin.

Ted DeDee, CFE, is the executive director of the Schermerhorn Symphony Center, which opens in September 2006 as the new home of The Nashville Symphony.